Sometimes I Like My Analogies

instead of a train of thought, it's more like a hovercraft
going somewhere but definately not grounded

What Depakote Does to Hair

I've been wanting to post about what I've gone through with my hair for some time now. So here I am, tension headached and cat in the lapped, ready with photos to explain the...hold on, cat has got to go. Hard to type around a furry beast.

My mom decided while I was rather little that I wouldn't have long hair...or hair past my ears for that matter. Yeah, I'm serious. She said it was too thick to brush through, I had a sensitive head, and it made me all sweaty and stinky. *shrugs* For whatever reasons, I had short hair.

When I moved was kicked out, I began to let my hair grow. Yeah, that late. I've got a just above chin length bob in my senior photo.

My hair has never grown fast. It is stupidly thick. And wavy, which tends to pull it up a bit and make it look even shorter. Ah, genetics.

Anyways, blah blah blah. It grew. By the time I got married, my hair was down to my waist. When I had Avalee, I thought (reallll stupidly) "Hey, let me cut my hair off to some utilitarian level...like at my chin!" So I looked like a mushroom again. And wouldn't you know it, I didn't ever lose my baby into my hair (as I had a friend's...that was embarrassing) in fact she loved to grab a lock of my hair and twirl it around and around as she rested. Go figure.

I don't have the energy to scan in any older photos so you all will just have to imagine what all this looked like, it's not hard.

So out sprouted my hair again. Well, sprouted in the way trees do...like live oaks...very slowly.

2005, and played with:















2006, ponytail (from Avalee height):














You get the idea. My hair was thick, wavy, contentiously blonde, and...well...rather attached to my head. So a short time after I move to NE Georgia, I start getting these headaches. Not just any headaches...migraines of rolling around on the bed, I can't cry because that's too painful, Oh My God my head's on fire! Bad.

After some time of hemming and hawing, I go to the neurologist. He can't find a problem (both good and bad news) and puts me on Depakote. He told me I could gain weight and that I would have to have my liver checked for problems. What he neglected to tell me was that the medicine also caused hair loss.

So what does hair loss mean when your hair is of a length most people call "rather long" or "butt length"?

It means that the hair can only "fall" so far before it gets tangled with the rest. It means this:

































Severe matting. Oh I cried and cried. Everytime I brushed even a section of my hair I had to empty my frat-paddle sized hairbrush. My bathroom trashcan was half full of hair. I took to wearing my hair in two braids (my hair was so thick, even sections of one braid could be matted by the lightest friction) like this:















You notice I say 'was so thick'? Yeah...

Well, after many tears and some contemplation, I asked Alex to grab his scissors. We took a look at where the hair was getting stuck the most and whacked off the hair to a line just above that.

Before:





















After:




















Then I noticed that, not only did I sacrifice about a foot in length, I lost at least an inch around. (If I understand correctly, one of the popular ways for measuring long hair is to ponytail it up and measure the circumference. Mine was between 4" and 5", no shit. Now, I'm afraid to check.)

One of the saddest things I think I'm experiencing now (amongst all this other bs) is the people who tell me it "looks so much better now" that I've cut it. Could they not actually believe that someone would not want to cut their hair? I like omg long hair and I enjoyed getting comments from random people who would say "Oh, your hair is so pretty! Don't cut it!" Mind you, I've actually had one older woman pick up my hair and pet it before....and that kinda weirded me out, but it was sweet. I guess it had entered the public domain at that point.

So, where does this put me? Well, I am determined to let my hair grow out again. I'd like to get of the Depakote (now) but must find a replacement in order to deal with the daily migraines. Maybe if I start measuring it monthly, I'll feel some small bit of encouragement. Who knows.

Quick! To the Outdoors!

It's sunny! I should take photos of my projects while it's nice. brb.

New Stuff

I picked up two skeins of Misti Alpaca chunky yarn from Main Street this past Saturday. I couldn't stop petting it! Sooooo soft! I agonized for a short time over what I should make with it. I knew I'd be using huge needles and wanted to maintain the loose loft the stuff has. I also knew I wanted something I could snuggle into. So rather than make a scarf, I made a cowl. (Yay, circular knitting!) I just cast on however many stitches until it 'seemed' about right with my #17s and knit away. It is very snuggly. I only used one skein though. The other one awaits! I'm thinking a hat. That way I can pull the hat down around my ears and the cowl up around my cheeks. You'll only be able to see my smiling eyes from behind a fuzzy screen of white. hehehe!

I've also, *gasp*, ordered yarn! For a garment! *gasp, gasp* I picked out some nice stormy blue for the Petersburg vest from Rowan 42 (I think). I...must...learn...correct...gauge. Must, must, must. Arg.

Hey, I'm hungry.

I've been cheating on reading Tale of Genji. I know, beat me with a soba noodle. Instead I've been carefully rereading the first Memory, Sorrow, and Thorn book by Tad Williams. I say carefully cause I've reread this book so much it's literally falling apart in my hands! And I have a sneaking suspicion this is my second copy. *blushes*

I Actually Returned Library Books

I'd had some of them for nearly a year. Since I hadn't gotten around to scanning and documenting the contents (they were costume and medieval fiber books), I felt I'd had my chance and should release them back into the wild.

Of course I couldn't leave the library without a few more. *laughs* I grabbed the Waley translation of Lady Murasaki's 'Tale of Genji.' It was surprisingly narrow. Waley was honored for keeping to the spirit of the novel rather than the letter (which is always a toughy when translating Japanese), so I picked that one out of the selection here. I'm also doing it to celebrate the 1000 year anniversary (a bit late but whatever) of the book. http://genji1000.jp/english/

I also grabbed (not easy to find here surprisingly) a "learn French on your own" book. I actually, much to the derision of my bf, want to learn this language...at least for reading purposes. The book insists that the student not, absolutely not, use the book without a teacher or the records (it's from 1943) that go with it. I'm being all rebellious and stuff I guess. I can't really use my copy of the Rosetta Stone due to the hyper-sensitive hearing issue and accompanying migraines. Besides, the drawn out, stilted, overly neutral nature of the voices gets on my nerves.

Well Dang!

Out of the frying pan and into the fire.
I just got rid of (a lung) my chest cold a few days ago. Now I've got the migraine from hell. Figures huh?
On a positive knitterly note, I worked on the Chain Socks some last night while watching the last few episodes of Avatar Season 1 (that show is GOOD!) and half an episode of Rock of Love Bus (that show is a train wreck). I have turned the heel and rejoined everything so that it's just circular from here on. yay!!!!

ETA: So I stomped (quietly) over to the office next door to investigate the constant loud banging noises I'm hearing. Turns out they're working on the window over there in order to fix the ladybug infestation problem. I didn't have any way to stop the noise but did manage to give the evil eye.